The Wonder of Two Becoming One
Discovering God's Design for Companionship and Unity in Marriage
Our first granddaughter got married this past Saturday, September 21, 2024. Her wedding has me thinking about marriage and the extraordinary life it brings.
Betty and I have been married for over 51 years. She is the only woman I have ever been with. I think she is the most incredible woman God ever made. I believe every man should feel the same about his wife, but there you have my confession.
When my children got married, I felt immense joy for them, knowing the happiness and fulfillment that being a husband and then a dad brought to my life. Now, as a granddad and great-granddad, I am experiencing a new level of joy and love.
Have you ever considered the wonder of marriage?
Love overflowing and joy outpouring.
Marriage is all about mutual submission and sacrificial love. This means that both partners willingly yield to each other, putting the other’s needs above their own, just as we learn from our Father and our brother, Jesus. Husbands are to love their wives like Christ loves the church, which is a sacrificial, selfless, and unconditional love. The husband is to give his life for his wife, and as the wife submits to the husband’s leadership, she does precisely the same thing. This mutual submission and sacrificial love is the foundation of a strong and enduring marriage. For further reading, go to Ephesians 5:21-33.
Betty and I have found that marriage was God’s greatest gift to us after salvation. We have been together through incredible highs and near bottomless pits, losing loved ones, the birth of all our children, financial hard times, and blessed times, alone and surrounded, but mostly, we have learned by growing in our relationship with Jesus and each other. Every day, we have a stronger, deeper relationship with God until we blend almost into the same person, and then our goal is to become more and more like Jesus every day.
Love is an action, not an emotion.
TV and movie love is based primarily on lust or getting what I want and what will make me feel good. Biblical Christian marriage love is based on giving. It is a love that is patient, kind, and not self-seeking.
Love is based on what you do, not what you get. It is a love based on giving, seeking the best for your spouse, and just loving as Jesus Christ loves us. For more, read I Corinthians 13:4-7.
You can’t stay happily married if you do not learn that it is not about you. There are plenty of jokes about who runs the house, wears the pants, or the abusive, almost disappearing husband. But a great marriage is based on giving, not pleasing ourselves but living for our partner.
God made us for companionship.
When God created humans, he told us it was not good for man to be alone. He made a man and then completed that man by making a woman. God intended marriage to be a lifelong union between man and woman.
The very picture of love is the relationship with Christ and the Church. It is not good for a man to be alone.
When Betty and I met, we became friends long before I even thought of marrying her. We went everywhere together. We became an item to where people who knew us expected us to marry before we even considered it.
Betty was and is my best friend, my companion, the person who is closest to me and knows me the best. Where else would you have gotten that if God had not given us marriage?
Marriage is not just about two individuals, but a shared life. It’s about walking hand in hand, facing life’s challenges together, and celebrating each other’s victories. There is an oneness that many will not understand. There was a time when Betty’s dad pulled her aside and warned her we were in danger of losing our identities. We were together so much and so codependent that he feared his daughter would lose herself.
From the very beginning, we believed that was the goal, and over the years, we can confidently say that, we are one. We have our own lives. We still don’t always agree, but we are one, and we are together.
God’s plan
God’s plan was that man should not be alone. He made a very special person to complete him. This person would be the flesh of his flesh and bone of his bone. They would be one. They would work together to glorify God.
God’s plan for marriage is indeed special and good. He created a companion for a man, someone who would be the perfect match for him. After 70 years of life and 51 years of marriage, I can confidently say that God’s plan is indeed very good.
Today, the devil hates marriage. He hates everything I have said in this article. His intention is to confuse everyone. He wants to suck all the joy out of life. Don’t let him.
My Desire for my children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren
Every time we go to a wedding of one of our family, I dream that they be as happy as Betty and I are and have been. I want them to enjoy the difficulties and the blessings of life together. They should know the love of being united. I hunger for my male offspring to find the most incredible woman God ever made. I pray that my female offspring will know the joy of having a man who loves and tenderly leads them.
God did it, and it is very good.
