Embracing the Journey: Encouragement for Those Battling Cancer

Navigating the Emotional Rollercoaster of Cancer and Family Support

Cancer is Back

When you have cancer, you have regular meetings with your oncologist and, in my case, with my surgeon. He had cut the tumors out and declared me cancer-free for the moment.

He warned clearly that there was a 50/50 chance the cancer would return. Typically, you return for scans every three months, then proceed to six months, and finally, one scan a year.

I didn’t make it that far. About the second scan or six months, they noticed a growth. Not sure what it was, they decided to monitor it and see if it grew.

As they said, the body grows crazy things. Then, I suppose, at the ninth month, they decided I should get a biopsy to see if it was a cyst, just a growth or returning cancer.

About that time, the scans revealed a spot on my lungs that was about a quarter inch in size. Then, they noticed something else in the tube leading to the pancreas and the gallbladder.

They did a biopsy of the one that concerned them the most and found it to be cancer. I am still waiting for an endoscopy where they put a camera down my throat to my stomach or beyond to check out what they hope is just a cyst that I do not need to worry about.

I am currently in the waiting game. One is a cancerous tumor, and the doctors are considering my options. The spot on the lung doesn’t seem to grow, so they are unconcerned about that right now.

The endoscopy will reveal if I have a problem in the pancreas area or if it is just a cyst that I am not to worry about.

Doctor’s opinion

Based on the textbook and anything I might have seen on Google, I should have already been dead, but I am an unusual case. I have beaten all the odds. As he repeatedly said, I have reset the clock over and over.

Earlier, I had found that my life expectancy was five years or fewer. He said that I need not concern myself with that because my tumors were very slow growing, and I just kept beating the odds.

So, for now, they will continue to monitor, and we will decide on a course of action in a few months.

They are considering whether or not surgery might be an option, or extremely high-dose radiation, which is the only kind that kidney cancer might respond to, or a return to the immunotherapy that I was so miserable with.

The doctor said he would adjust and work with me and promised I would not suffer like before. He said, regardless, it worked with you, and we shouldn’t take it off the table.

Thought process

I am writing all of this so that those who read will believe me when I say that I understand, at least in part, what they are going through with cancer or a life-threatening disease.

I want to help people keep looking up, trusting God, and getting better. We may not be able to beat the disease, but we do not have to let the disease beat us.

God gives his people peace, and it can be yours. Even in the deepest valley, we are never alone as believers. In all these things, we are more than conquerors. We will win in this, too.

I also want to help the family of the patient deal with the disease and help the patient. I also want you to know that I know that, as cancer patients, we are not the only ones suffering from cancer.

I had a friend who was dying. He has been in heaven for a long time now. When he was dying, he started getting very ugly, especially with his wife.

I spent over 60 days of the last of his life with him. We were friends. I boldly told him one day that he needed to back off his wife even though he was tired of her constantly telling him what to do and mothering him.

He said. Well, I am the one “doing the dying” here. I shocked him by saying that wasn’t true. We were all dying with him and, especially, his wife.

He laughed and said you are the only one who could get away with talking to me like that.

Patient

Doctors don’t know, and scans don’t show it all. It is your body. God knows where you are, so do not let them scare you so badly. Know that God is at work and in control. He will take care of you until He is ready to take you home.

Do not crawl into a fetal position. Do not be mean to those who love you. Ask God to help you not be so snappy because you are tired of what you are dealing with.

Get out, exercise, get in the sun, do things you enjoy, and spend extra time with your family and friends.

Get into the Bible and draw close to God. If death is a genuine threat, then now is the time to grow in your relationship with God like never before.

Whatever you do, get up daily and live it to the fullest. No one has more than today, so trust God to make today a day that brings him glory.

Do not let your hurt cause you to hurt those you love, and do not let discouragement cause you to waste the days you have.

Cast all your cares and your fears on the Lord. He cares for you.

Family and friends

Understand that your family member or friend needs time to process all the news. Sometimes, just being there without telling them it is all going to be alright might help more than anything.

Don’t live in a state of fear. Don’t dodge the issue. Often, the patient wants to talk about it. You just have to be sensitive to when and if they want to talk.

Express your feelings, and be present. Understand their frustrations and if they respond incorrectly to your love.

Remember, they dislike feeling so needy, being in the way, or being a burden.

Both you and the patient will feel emotions from anger, shock, fear, sadness, and hopelessness.

Let your family member grieve.

About me

I have lost about 55 pounds on purpose. I feel great and wouldn’t know I had cancer if the scans didn’t show the tumors, cysts, and spots. I am trusting God. I know I will live as long as He has planned for me, and I want to use it all for His honor and glory.

I work everyday writing, doing podcasts, coaching young men, studying to preach, and preaching several times a week. I am enjoying life, so you need not worry about me.